May 5th 2010

It’s 9am. I just made a cup of hot milo for myself. I’m feeling sian at the thought of having to buy groceries soon. This is not because I don’t like buying groceries. But it’s the uncertainty that comes with it. Like dunno what to buy. Dunno whether it’s cheap. Dunno whether I should buy that now or whatever. Ai ya just uncertainty and I don’t like uncertainty I guess. Anyway yesterday I booked my flight to Vancouver alr. 23rd of May. Yay. I’m looking forward to Vancouver.

So today, weather seems pretty good. It snowed yesterday. In fact yesterday yesterday, there was a snow blizzard I think and apparently I was sleeping. The car was socked in snow yesterday and I didn’t know how to get the snow off the windscreen and stuff. I walked around like an idiot trying to use the shovel to scrape of the ice, and in the end I realized water does the trick. So I got the cooking pot and filled it with water and kept splashing water over the car. Then later in the day I realized there was an ice scraper inside the car. Haha.

I called cathay to check whether I could fly back a week earlier, but they say cannot. So I’m really gonna stay in the usa till 11th june. I’m now planning whether I should go to san Francisco after Vancouver or not.

Ok then yesterday clinic was quite good. It’s quite chill. When got patients then I will go clerk them, then later present to the doctor. So yup before I knew it, it was 5pm alr. I bought a beef wrap earlier in the day and it sucked so today I’m bringing bread to eat for lunch. I’m really lazy to cook and the thought of having to cook my dinner everyday is quite sian. Haha. Gahh I’m so lazy I should learn to be less lazy.

Ok going to the clinic soon. Hope today is a good day..


May 6th 2010

8:13am now. I woke up today morning, and was greeted with thick thick snow. There was another snow storm last night. My car was showered with snow. Zzz. I used to watch shows and stuff and thought waa so nice snow. But it’s not funny, when u’re so far from home, all alone in a house, haven’t got a clue how to deal with snow. Haha. But anyway the doctor’s son came to my house and told me it should be ok, and that he’ll escort me home from the clinic later with his truck. I listened to aunty carolin’s sermon and one mike pilavacchi sermon last night. I also cooked aglio olio which as usual tasted bad. Sianz. I’m like never gonna get it right.

As I was reflecting a short while ago, the sian part of army for me wasn’t in the training actually. I mean some parts of it was sian, but it was more in the fact that I’m far from home, without my circle of friends. I’m starting to realize a lot that how I feel is very much determined by whether I’ve friends around me. For example, I was sian in Changi Hospital cos I was doing my posting alone and like I didn’t have much friends around me. But when I have friends around me, I think even if the work was very sian, very hard, very tough, I can do it without much fuss I think. Kinda like cross country training in sec 2. I was training 7 days a week but I was ok, cos I enjoyed my friends company and we were working towards something. Same in canoeing, RJ canoeing too. When I don’t know a lot of people, then it becomes sian for me. But when I know people well and get along with them, then I think I feel good and like can do anything. I think I’ve to remember that when I work next time, so that I choose an environment where I’m happy. It’s really about whether I’ve friends around me, rather than the work. Ai ya in the end medicine is all the same la. Just that maybe surgery you get to use ur hands but ai ya whatever la. I wanna work with enjoyable, chill, friendly funny people.

So I do feel sian now! Because I’m quite alone.. however I’m getting more comfortable in the clinic I guess. Getting more a hang of it, had a chat with my doctor yesterday as well. The clinic was really quite quiet yesterday, not many patients..

Ok so anyway, I’m looking forward to the end of my Montana stay alr. Haha. My plan is to visit Yellowstone national park, maybe try to go on a hike or sth if the weather permits, and that’s about it, the rest of the time I just wanna stay in my cabin and hide there. Haha.

I’m flying to Vancouver on 23rd May. Then I’m most probably going San Francisco one week later, then I’ll fly to new york, AND THEN I’LL FLY HOMEEEE ARHH I WANNA COME HOME HAHA. On the morning of 11th June, I will pump my fists up in victory. Then I’ll smile all the way to the airport. Then on the plane I’ll watch movies. Then I’ll reach hong kong. And my heart will be beating faster and faster as I board the plane to Singapore. Then when I see a sight of Singapore, tears will well up in my eyes and I’ll shout “SINGAPORE!!!!!” hahaha. I’m LOL-ing to myself now. Ahh I miss home. So much for being a travel lover. Haha.

Ok but I guess this is good training for me, in the sense I’m really learning to be independent, and to be less scared of being alone, taking charge, taking care of myself that kinda thing. I mean, next time when I become a father, that’s what I gotta do right. If I bring my family on a holiday next time, at least I’ll have this experience behind me. I think this will be a valuable experience to have with me. Ok. Gonna wash my face and get ready to swim through the snow to my clinic.. Stay Positive David!